I never thought I was going to reach this point in my life, becoming something I always hated. I never thought the devil could posses me in such manner.
Now damage has been made, hate and fear have been planted in the heart I promised to always take care of.
How am I supposed to deal with myself now? I was forgiven, but I never will forgive myself. I have become the main reason for all this hate I feel now, I hate myself.
There’s no place to run and hide now, not even in my mind, there’s no escape from myself and all the guilt I feel.
What have I done? Will I ever forgive myself? Can I take all this and still be fine? What am I supposed to do?
There’s only one thing for sure, I will never become again the beast I was back then, I’ll never hurt again, and if that means I must control myself before I let go, then so be it.
